Since depression and anxiety are very universal things which are more commonly than not a part of someone’s therapeutic process I thought it may be helpful to just give a few tips to take an edge off. This does not take the place of therapy but can at least give something so you have a start.

1. Take a quick review of the previous week. Examine when you have been feeling most depressed/anxious and when least.

It’s a great behavioural hack to recognise what is going on in each of the states (the assumption here that there are times you are feeling better) then see if you can commit to a 10% increase of the happier environment/activities and 10% decrease of what increases depression and anxiety.

A common reflection could be something like the recognition that being in one’s room mulling over things is associated with depression and anxiety whereas talking to a friend, watching a movie is a time you feel better. See if you can just make a small switch even by just 10% for the next week.

2. Commit to 3 new actions/activities to alter things ‘potentially’ for the better.

This is a lead on from number 1 particularly if you couldn’t think of anything. Although Counselling/Coaching is a talking way of working which helps it’s so important to remember that we don’t need to ‘feel like’ doing something or to wait for that. Just actually doing an action by default alters our physiology and state and can then move us into a more empowered way of being.

Ideas could be: Have a 20 minute walk 3 times over the next week. Reach out to and connect with a friend. Take action to create a new connection (meetup.com is great). Cook yourself a nice meal. Write 10 things you are grateful for.

To emphasise again these things won’t necessarily solve the overall issue but a new action to take an edge off can be a great start.

3. Ask yourself the miracle question.

This is a lovely very solution focussed practice which can often get to deep levels when we really go into it.
The miracle question is asking yourself what life would be like if there was a magic wand and suddenly you woke up tomorrow and everything was the way you wanted.
What would be happening ? How would you be feeling? How would you be living your life? What would you be doing and how would you be showing up ?

For example you may say something like : things would be really great with my partner, we’d be interacting well, we’d be doing fun stuff together. I’d be doing x type of work which I really enjoy. By bringing out what we’d like life to look like we can then pick out what we can maybe do to start to create this. The focus is then not on the depression/anxiety and what we want to go away but rather on what we want to create.

This is an opportunity to start to show up in a new way. Can you take an action around finding a new role for work or maybe showing up differently in your current role so you can enjoy it more? Can you ask your partner to do something together ?

Sometimes the miracle question by nature brings up things which aren’t possible. e.g. the person I lost last year would be with us. This is a perfectly fine answer and within this more exploration can happen and the acknowledgement that we are looking for more good connections and making new good memories and the potential search for how we may be able to create something else in our life now.

4. Practice therapeutic breathing.

This can be a good hack to relieve anxiety. SImply my focusing on our breathing we can take some charge over our physiology to create a calmer state.

An exercise I often teach clients is the following:

1. Take a deep breath in and count to 10 while holding your breath and breathe out while saying the words ‘Relax , two, three’.
2. Breathe in while counting to 3 in your head.
3. Breathe out while saying the words ‘Relax, two , three’.
4. Repeat steps 2 and 3 three more times.
5. Repeat this whole process 3 times per day.

Note: These activities should give some hacks and a jolt to what you’ve been doing to start the process of change. Be honest with yourself and feel into where you are at. These are not intended to solve everything at all but can be a nice start. Counselling work is very useful to give a healing space to support the overall journey through depression and anxiety which can become crippling if not checked and worked with. Feel free to reach out should you wish to have support.