Ever since I read ‘Set yourself free’ by Shirley Smith many years ago I often go back to the breakdown she did of the word responsible to response able. I’d never thought of the word like that before but going into it like that is helpful to then contrast with its opposite which is being reactive.

Learning to respond rather than react is a general learning people go through on their journey of personal growth. Being able to look at times when you react or are more reactive than you would like to be can be a great access point to lean into.

Notice your reactivity but don’t condemn it. It’s just something that was occuring and is a past patterm which had some purpose. Maybe it was the way you had to be to get love in the past but it’s not effective now. Just feel it arising and recognise the way you ‘used to’ (always remember language) react and now work to ‘anchor’ something else which is aligned to your new found integrity which you are creating in yourself.

You can prime this person by looking at the lower pain and the higher pleasure this new personality (who is more you than before) will bring you. When you start to practice this person anchor it with something you like (I always love a takeaway coffee 🙂 ). It’s just like a muscle and you just need to train this person to get better and stronger until it all becomes a natural part of you.