I was always quite inspired by the Brene Brown Ted Talk on Vulnerability. Check it out if you haven’t already. She speaks about this being our centre point of courage, creativity and innovation. It’s a lovely talk.

Vulnerability is an unusual word and I can’t help but feel when anyone hears it we think I don’t want to be vulnerable as we associate it with weakness. Brene Brown herself comments on this and takes the angle I agree with totally that it is about courage, creativity and innovation.

She writes and speaks in a very eloquent manner I can really connect with and often this pops up in my couples work with clients as we speak about their relationship and connecting showing that it is definitely not a weakness at all but in fact profound human courage.

A few days ago one of my Coaching teachers, Annie Lalla, made a video speaking on this and said about just having the word honesty rather than necessarily seeking to be vulnerable.

I hadn’t really thought of it this way before but although I totally agree with Brene Brown in the sacredness of this vulnerable sharing and that real connection point which is really beautiful I felt that the idea of just being ‘honest’ to be so much more immediately accessible and less scary while perhaps better reaching the same benefits.

When I work with clients in couples and individually a big part of the work can be the expressing of the unsaid. When we say these things in the counselling space, and to others we can be free and experience the connection of another (potentially at least).

A member of a couple will sometimes express in a session how much something did actually bother them and share that they would really love for more of x y z to take place. This is just honest. It’s being human and real. It’s an expression of the unsaid and thereby bringing about the possibility of something new.

The habit of just being honest inevitably brings about points such as the above whereas we are vulnerable as Brene Brown would say.

So I wanted to just give you this, then you can maybe reflect on your life currently, your relationship to yourself and to others and maybe you don’t need to think about if you’re being vulnerable enough or even worry about that necessarily but simply look to be honest. If you’re being as honest as you can then healthily relating to yourself and to others (and these beautiful vulnerable courageous creative moments) should be able to follow.