I was just listening to a really insightful talk by personal branding expert Mark Lack. I’ve met him in person. He’s a great guy and has lots of great teachings.

I found it interesting how he spoke about identifying your passions and what your business is. He said how a teaching he got from an unknown apparent billionaire was that your business doesn’t need total overlap with your passion. He said there can be a false presumption that somehow your business should be your passion somehow or somehow you are failing or as if as soon as you do a business you’re just living your passion.

He said to identify what your passions are and what your values are. These are both interesting exercises I’d encourage you to try. There’s also exercises you can do of feeling into what your main qualities are you bring to the world. I guess this is tied into an assumption that you want to make a great impact.

The teaching was that we earn our right to do our passion (e.g. time with family, movies, video games) which may or may not be linked to your actual business.

I realised in my main values I have care, relationships, personal growth and interestingly enough ‘excitement’. I see my skills I bring to the world are a care for people and a genuine desire to help and be impactful.

I saw that on the passion level I am particularly passionate about movies and at points video games which provide no monetary value, at least not now. Nonetheless these were linked with my value of excitement, they bring fun and variety into my life which is important as a value link in who I am.

So last night there was a greater excusable playing some video games as something I’d earned after a hard days work (plus movie after) which was aligned with my values and a passion but not something monetary.

Linking these together and following Marks’ teaching I can see how wins are created on the monetary level from the vision of wanting to have an impact and the learning of skills aligned to this which then gives more freedom to explore passions (earning the right to them). Being honest about what your values are at the core can help this all become integrated together. I think it’s true also that when we can see how these tie together that learning something we may not be immediately passionate about e.g. marketing, then getting wins and doing our passion stuff more will lead us to be more passionate about the thing we are learning.

I saw a lot of dots joining for me as I did this exercise. Maybe have a go. What comes up for you ?

I find trauma to regularly be part of someones’ journey in the Counselling space to one degree or another. The author Peter Levine has written a great book called ‘ Waking the tiger: healing trauma.’ This is a great start point for anyone who feels impacted by trauma.

It’s as if with trauma we are having a normal response to an experience which was unexpected, something out of the ordinary. The term ‘rabbit startled in headlights’ can sometimes explain what occurs.

It’s as if through a shock all our energy in our body which would have come out , e.g. in the rabbits case if they’d just hopped across the road gets all trapped inside. There is a freeze with a lot going on inside but the inability to move and to act.

Memories and emotions often stir around us and can become problematic. The term ‘post traumatic stress disorder’ is used for when this doesn’t get solved and people start to have nightmares and are constantly triggered by seemingly smaller events that of their own accord are not so problematic. I’ll always remember being in Manchester (my home city) in 1996 when there was in fact a bomb in an area which I overheard from a long distance away. I chatted to a young man who had been closer to it who looked extremely nervous and seemed as if he was going to jump out of his skin when someone walked by and just happened to kick a can on the street by chance. To a level this person was traumatised.

Speaking through a trauma in an empathic Counselling forum allows the shock to come to the surface and to come out in a safe space. It’s here that the space to truly ‘process’ what has gone on can occur so our body comes back into balance again.

Trauma always strikes me as a strong word and there are different degrees of trauma and post traumatic stress. I find it can be helpful to use it as a general term that more often than not people have experienced to one degree or another. It’s never a case of who has had the objectively ‘bigger’ trauma but rather in an empathic space to find out what is your truth about what had occurred and for this to be given respect.

I find the space of Counselling typically very healing to begin with and then however long it takes there is usually a pushing out to do new things in this direction. Being traumatised from a past relationship a person may have a space of feeling through it fo a long time and simply not want to date at this stage whatsoever. Usually overtime there is a natural level of a growth and a wanting to move on. This should never be rushed but is typically an organic process of growth.

Feel free to reach out should you feel a level of trauma and wish to work on this and feel free to share any personal thought son trauma.

Take care

A ten session package is my best value offer which is a great way to work. By using one session per week we can use Counselling to spend time going into any distress from the past to come to greater balance and also use Coaching to really look into and create the new future. This package is at a 10 percent discount from if the sessions were purchased separately. Reach out to claim your space. 021 058 3234.